(no subject)

[i_kender]

I would have loved to have floated in our paddling pool this weekend (shades of Dustin Hoffman in The Graduate) as temperatures in our garden hit the early 30’s C… but alas it is currently green with algae. And, apparently, contains a chalky crust on top. And, possibly, wee.

I was still tempted.

Saturday night saw me going to the Worst Club in The World Ever* to keep Jeff awake. (Jeff is the old university friend who was visiting from LA) His flight was on Sunday morning, and because it takes so long to fly back to LA, he was determined to make a late night of it so he could sleep through the flight.

However, he was completely broke. And he only turned up at mine at 10:30 pm. This limited our choices a little.

So I took him to some godawful local club. It was in a dingy basement room (Check) It had an awful name (Check - “The Zone”) There were dodgy single blokes in their 20s and 30s (Check) and groups of girls who were clearly still in school wearing very little - but with an entire department stores supply of makeup (Check) The music was appalling R&B remixes that nobody could dance to with slapped-on arrhythmic beats and growly rapping,  played by an old white geezer in his 60s with thick glasses (Check and check). And, thank the boogying night spirits of the bacchanal, the booze was cheap (Ch-hic-eck)

The only thing that consoles me is that Jeff had an okay time… he even, um, danced (shakes head incredulously) and that I now have a standing invitation to hang out in LA, with reciprocal looking-after. That’s a fair trade I think.

Sunday I hid in shame mostly slept through. And it’s still too hot to type… excuse me while I peel my keyboard off the tips of my fingers.

*(in Hounslow anyway, he hastily adds)