Four Years Gone

[i_kender]

and then one day you wake up and snap four years are gone just like that.

To Selena, who left without saying goodbye just to irritate me forever for having had the last word. Who was not perfect but precisely flawed and human: who was intelligent and kind and witty and sharp and big-hearted, and also sometimes irritable and whiny and loudmouthed and opinionated, but who had a good heart and was roundly loved by more people than she realised. Who was a greedy spoiler whore and a messy eater.

You made some tough choices in your life, but you lived it your way and on your terms, and refused to take less than what you were worth. I admire that.

I’m still angry at you for leaving the way you did. And I also envy you, that you don’t have to put up with the painful tedium of this often dismal world. But I try not to be.

I remember the weight of your hand on my arm.

I remember that awful braying hysterical dying hyena laugh that often left you in tears. I have never heard anything like it.

Here’s to you, hon. I hope your houris are phenomenal. 

Comments

[warlordkittens.livejournal.com]

*hugs tightly*

[warlordkittens.livejournal.com]

And another thing: made me wish I'd known her. And heard the dying hyena laugh.

[i_kender]

It was... not terrifying exactly, but a thing of awe! ;)

[i_kender]

Thank you hon.

[lahermite.livejournal.com]

"who left without saying goodbye just to irritate me forever for having had the last word"

isn't that just the most awful thing.

"I’m still angry at you for leaving the way you did"

i wonder if the anger ever really goes away. it seems not to. :(

[i_kender]

No, you never forget, and the anger and pain doesn't fade... it just drifts further into the past.

[arnavtul.livejournal.com]

god that is beautiful! I hope when my day comes someone will write something even half as beautiful about me. You are an amazing friend who has the talent for seeing what is best in people.

[i_kender]

Thanks hon *hugs you*

[apple-crumble.livejournal.com]

Gone too soon.

*raises G&T to the mad ol' gal*

[i_kender]

Mad old cow.

oh, please give my love to the manwife today please, treat him well.

[nightxade.livejournal.com]

Well said. What a woman.

(And for the record, her final post to me was about Halle Berry in Catwoman. I have serious plans to speak with her about that.)